confusion, frustration, and compassion at the la city public counter

it took 4 trips to get it done, but my application for a change of use permit finally got accepted at the la city construction public counter. here's a synopsis of the process:

thursday, january 31, 1:00 pm
city planner: (leaving message on my voicemail) i signed off on your application, but you'll need to get the application notarized, physically submit it at the public counter, and pay the fees. then it'll get sent back to me.


thursday, january 31, 3:15 pm
me: (at the public counter, after picking up documents from city planning, going to a notary) i'd like to submit this application and pay the fees.

person at counter: oh, it's past 2:30, we can't take any cases after 2:30. come back tomorrow.

me: but all i need to do is to pay a fee so that the city planner can process my application.

person at counter: we don't accept cases after 2:30 pm. (taking a look at my documents) make sure you bring a copy of your lease to verify that you're authorized to make the tenant improvements.

me: how long will it take to accept my case?

person at counter: it seems like an easy case. it shouldn't take very long.


friday, february 1, 8:30 am
me: (at public counter): i'd like to submit my application, please.

person at counter: oh, this is the wrong counter. you need to go to counter 8.

me: but this is where i was directed.

person at counter: i'm sorry, you'll have to get another number and wait in line.

me: but this is where i was directed.

person at counter: you have to get another number and wait in line.

me: but i've been waiting for a while now and i have to get to work soon.

person at counter: and it looks like other people are ahead of you and it might take a while.

me: but, but... (resigning, placing my documents back into my manila envelope, putting my scarf back on, walking away)

monday, february 4, 7:45 am
me: (where else? at the public counter) i'd like to submit my application, please.

person at counter: let me see your documents. (checking documents, consulting computer) we need the property owner's signature to accept this application.

me: but the person whom i spoke with last time i was here said that i only needed to bring my lease.

person at counter: no, the property owner needs to sign this application.

me: but he's in santa monica and won't be able to get here any time soon. and my lease states that i'm authorized to make tenant improvements.

person at counter: that means nothing. we need a notarized signature.

me: but that's not what i was told last time.

person at counter: that's not my problem.

me: but, but... (fuming, placing documents back into manila envelope, putting scarf back on, walking away)


tuesday, february 5, 8:00 am
me: (at the pit of despair, aka la city public counter) i'd like to submit my application, please.

person at counter: let me see your documents. (looking at me) you were here yesterday, yes?

me: yes. and the day before that, and the day before that.

person at counter: (stamping documents, assigning me a case number) now you go to the cashier, make copies of these documents, and bring them back to me.

(a period of time elapses)

me: (back at counter) i paid the fees. and here are copies of the documents.

person at counter: now these documents need to be mailed to your neighborhood council. that's going to be $1.50, plus $1 service charge.

me: i don't have any cash on me. can i just mail it out later when i get back home?

person at counter: no, we mail it out for you. you need to pay for the stamps.

me: (holding out my fare for the metro, tears welling up at the prospect of having to come back yet another time) i only have $1.25...

person at counter: (going through his pockets) here. i have some change i can give you.

me: th-thanks. (vklempt at this display of human compassion at the public counter, handing over my $1.25 metro fare, putting scarf back on, walking away from pit of despair, spring in my step for getting through another bureaucractic process)